Girl
Sister
Niece
Dad
Friend
Jennifer Hawkins (Miss Universe 2004)
PLOT:
Girl gets asked by Sister to undertake important role at christening of niece. Girl decides she needs a new red dress, and shops high and low for THE perfect red dress. Girl finds to her horror, that "watermelon" seems to be the only red around! People say girl looks good in red. Not watermelon. Girl gives up and tries every other-colour-of-the-rainbow dress on. But she pines for red. Girl gives up altogether. Girl moans to friend about lack of red dresses in-the-whole-world. Friend (who is Trinny & Susannah all rolled into one) spends day off work searching for THE red dress for girl (even though she is appalled by meagre budget she is given.) Friend phones girl with many choices. Then friend emails girl photo of THE dress. Girls heart stops beating. It is THE red dress! It is (ahem) a little over budget, but she will love it and wear it forever! Girl is happy, although she ignores big flashing warning sign. Warning, warning - dress is being modelled by Jennifer Hawkins -warning, warning. Girl still ignores. Friend is so happy for girl, that she phones every Myer store in West Australia, to find there is only one size 10 in whole of the State! But Size 10 is only 2 minutes from where girls' Dad lives! It's an omen. Girls' Dad happily agrees to pick up dress for girl (though almost has heart attack when he thinks girl tells him it is $449.00 not $149.00. ) Dad and girl meeting for lunch next day. Dad phones girl in morning to confirm he has dress. Warning, warning - Dad says he thinks dress is a little sexy for a christening. Warning, warning. Girl doesn't do sexy (unless it's outdoor bath in Thailand.) Girl thinks it's just Dad talk and ignores him. Dad and girl meet. Dad hands over bag with dress. Girl fondles material. It is THE red dress! Big B & Little E agree - it is THE red dress. Girl buys tiny cardie to cover sexy shoulders in church. Girl spends many hours Christmas shopping and isn't able to try on dress until 2.54pm ...
CONCLUSION:
It takes a whole village to raise a child. It takes a whole cast of characters to find THE red dress. And it takes one heartbreaking second to realise you're not Jennifer Hawkins.
2 comments:
Um..EXCUSE ME?! Where is the picture of the GIRL in the red dress. There is no stinkin' picture of the girl in the red dress?! Besides this Jennifer stick figure person, who is all airbrushed and how shall I put it, has her Facebook on, like BIG TIME!
Now, I am not religious, but that is one hot red dress to where in church. I love it! You get on with your bad self.
Ditto. I'm pining for the picture of THE GIRL in THE DRESS. My girl, not some silly blondie I've never heard of. And, wait--isn't there a pretty smoking picture of THE GIRL in a white dress just a few posts down? Yes, I believe there is. So I'm waiting for the red, Dearie--show us how you put blondie to shame.
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